BREAKING: Daryl Harper is a double agent, scuppers ICC plot

Last week The Reverse Sweep exclusively revealed  that a dossier had come into its possession that provided shocking evidence of the ICC's desperate plan to justify the ridiculous Umpire Decision Review System.

Before the dawn of 2010 the only fans of the system were the Channel 9 Cheerleaders Squad, who let's face it still yearn for the days of World Series Cricket when television held the cricket world to ransom.

Thankfully the Sky Sports, TMS and Test Match Sofa teams have all remained sceptical of an obviously flawed system

So the ICC devised a plan to gain support for the UDRS amongst cricket players, supporters and commentators worldwide.

That plan was unleashed on an unsuspecting cricket public in the 3rd Test between England and South Africa at Newlands.

As you may recall the plan was simple but brilliant.

It was codenamed Daryl Harper.

The ICC decided that the only way it could gain support for the UDRS would be to send the most incompetent umpire in cricket history to Cape Town and let his ineptitude take hold.

And Harper's diabolical decisions against Prince and KP resulted in the appearance that the UDRS was not such a bad system.

So I suggested that the only solution to stop support for the UDRS continuing to grow was to annihilate the Australian umpire. And I called for anyone who knew any friendly muggers or carjackers in Johannesburg, to please pay them generously.

Well, today Harper finally broke under the pressure.

After being moved into the third umpires chair by the ICC in order to further promote the UDRS, he buckled.

Asked to review the Cook dismissal he missed Morkel's blatant no-ball, upheld the on-field umpire's decision and thus helped condemn England to oblivion in the 4th test.

And suddenly the UDRS doesn't work again.

And now we can exclusively reveal that Harper is not only an agent of the evil ICC.

But also of a sinister force only known as Beefy and an avowed opponent of the UDRS.

Hopefully Harper will get his just deserts and someone will put a bomb in his UDRS equipment.

Prick. 

Comments

[SteakPieman]

Perhaps now when Harper takes the Third Umpires chair, the ICC should implement a system whereby the Third Umpires decision could be reviewed..... This could be called, Third Umpires Reviewed Decision System....... in short TURDS..

[The Reverse Sweep]

Brilliant. I think you could be on to something here. Alternatively they could just sack harper for being so unspeakably crap!